Back

What inadvertent loop

brought me back to the place

where all the stories of ancient fears

had congregated,

where they sat in cold knots

feeling forgotten but wielding

their influence, oozing their stain

onto my outlook?

How was it not enough

to remember

the warm expansiveness

of my liberation? How could I 

fit myself, cramped as ever,

back into those constrictions?

And how do I get back to free?

Since trying has failed,

I try not trying.

I look for the stillness

of not doing.

I may find myself back here again —

I’ll gain from learning to escape.

©Wendy Mulhern

October 16, 2016