Grateful

 

I wake up grateful
to be living in the house,
to have its warmth and work,
its frame and vistas

I wake up grateful
to be living in the world,
fraught and perilous though it may seem  -
it is the least I can do
for the life I am given,
my most honest standpoint
for seeing the day.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 31, 2021

A Mystery

 

I can't tell you about this,
snow melting, drips of rain coming down,
subtle elusive smells - cabbage? mammal?
crunch of crusted slush under my boots

I can't tell you why
a smile circles around and catches me
from behind, from within,
or why the sense of something poignant
hovers, just beyond recognition

Once again I feel
waves of understanding, of forgiveness,
of remorse  - of letting these be phases
in the crumbling of old perspectives
so truth can align to hold the
infinitely weighty but perfectly balanced place
where we can hold each other
in exquisite trust.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 30, 2021

Grace

 

The grace in this house
is a quiet thing
but it fills the spaces,
plays in light and shadow,
glows in color

The grace in this house
makes all the difference,
fills us up, too -
plays in the softness of faces,
glows in souls.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 29, 2021

Consider

 

Consider Spirit,
for where would you even think to be
without it? Why would you even care?

Consider Spirit,
for your very breath rises and falls
at its direction. Your desire to be alive
is its very imprint

Since you have never even
lifted a finger without it
(and you have been and done so much!)
does it not make sense
to let it carry you -
through all these seas and home,
through the whole winter
to the springing grasses?

©Wendy Mulhern
December 28, 2021

Enter Winter

 

We watch the snow come down,
we let the projects
crammed up against the calendar
wait another day,
we watch the sun come through,
and then the clouds
across the snow -
we let it be the main event,
we wrap our day around it

We keep the fire burning,
we let the hidden warmth
of our companionship
create for us a pause,
a place that we can rest in

Some great understanding hovers
just beyond our grasp -
we let its implications
drift down in.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 27, 2021

Happiness

 

Seems like happiness is tucked
under snowy limbs of trees
and in curls of clouds -
it comes springing out -
lifts my breath,
fills me with spaciousness,
kisses me like rare thick snowflakes
having their silent say.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 26, 2021

In Kinship

 

I give myself permission
to find myself lighter -
composed of elements
that sparkle and stream,
and mingle with the stream of
what floats in the air,
what circles and kindles tingles,
life leaping in molecules,
sending joy in rolling curves
up along the skin

I give myself permission
to be weighty, propelled by breath into
solid pushback against the floor,
finding the mountain stance
where I will not be moved

It is the same breath
in both cases, the same Spirit  -
I walk in kinship with the air and earth.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 25, 2021

Soft

 

Tonight we feel
we can settle down softly,
like snow, like radiant heat.
We can be soft with ourselves
for the work we haven't done,
for the time we need
to gather resolution
for the final push

Tonight we feel
we have been filled with friendship,
and can use its model
to walk our way out
of the pit of isolation,
till what we see as distant stars
become our beacons
and our beacons
become our light.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 24, 2021

Looking Back

 

According to my journals,
I've made no progress at all.
I'm wrestling with the same stuff,
I'm flying on the same hope  -
I see the bracing path rise up before me,
feel stronger with each vista I attain

I had imagined I'd be coming back by now,
bearing treasure, telling tales of all my victories,
but the trail demands I keep attention forward
and leave my dreams of accolades behind

According to my journals,
back last year I also battled darkness,
and last year I also walked in light,
and maybe there's no final victors' banquet,
just the daily work of taking steps aright.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 22, 2021

Fractures

 

In this fractured dream world
there is no is,
no state of being right,
no state of being
a certain kind of person

There are no facts about the past,
there is no structure of
the current state of things

However long we grapple with
our and each other's
version of the truth,
however justified our story seems,
we won't get closer
to anything that represents us fairly

Through the fractures in this dream world,
sometimes
light can be seen  -
Oh light, be my justice,
enlightening me,
Oh light, be my vision
and teach me to see.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 21, 2021

The light that gives us meaning

 

It seems the right time of year
for us to fall into darkness,
for the day to sock in,
for the lights to go out,
for the water heater
to have no juice

And in the view of flames
for us to contemplate
the light that gives us meaning,
how it rushes in with a similar sound,
how it wakes up limbs and toes,
how it illumines our desire and purpose
and will sustain us
even when the solar light is gone.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 20, 2021

Mushroom hunting

 

Scanning the ground
where the soft curve of brown
that I'm looking for turns out,
every time, to be acorns,
or the soft lobes of oak leaves
settling down. It is their season now,
it seems - they rest together quietly,
intimate whispers in the dampness,
curling in for winter's rest

I ask my belly then
to send an invitation to the mushrooms
to join the dance of things
that unlock molecules
so elements go free
to seek out other pairings

It is happy to oblige
and soon I find some mushrooms
in the amber tones of its delighted language

There is more to learn of this
than what I noticed here - the invitation
extends to me -
to come back often
to join this dance.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 18, 2021

Story Arc

 

(From the virtual biking philosophers' notebook)

My feet step down each day on earth
but don't define my story.
My story leaps in looping arcs,
bounces down the street
like children tethered to a parent's hand,
their darting jumps forever anchored back,
encouraged by security

My story leaps for meaning
and will connect sometimes
to consequences that light it up,
closing all the circuits down the line,
illuminating bridges, tracks, and tunnels

Showing what was relevant
from all those steps throughout my time,
showing what was destiny,
or thus defining it,
the future giving meaning to the past,
the place I land creating my past path.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 17, 2021

Ready to dream

 

And when the day's tough times were over,
the dogging demons not so much defeated
as dispersed, not ever seeming
to be obedient, but simply passing
outside of my attention,
after the fire was long gone
but the stone was still warm,
the waxing gibbous moon
peered through the clouds,
bright enough to cast a shadow,
and dark blue patches showed
between the clouds,
and nothing that had bothered me
was worth taking to bed
where everything waits
to be recombined.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 16, 2021

Radiance

 

Let me leave the lumps behind
(collateral of judgment)
let the things I say lift free
like flame, like grace,
like being moved by music
in a dance with no pretension

Let me abandon
all pontification, weights
that can fall haplessly
on someone else's toes,
let my expression
welcome others to their own,
let it celebrate their light
such that we multiply  -
our signal spanning light years,
our radiance close at hand,
bringing warmth and life
to all the land.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 15, 2021

Bones

 

Let's start at the beginning
where my bones know your bones,
where they can feel them laugh,
mirth ripples echoing
down their shafts,
delight inherent

Let's start at the beginning
where they confide trustingly
the solid truth about themselves,
the longing and the confidence,
the places they hold open
for the rest of us to play -
how glad they are that we've availed ourselves
of their hospitality,
that we have come home here
to be together.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 13, 2021

Take possession of your body

 

At the voice of Truth, your body
thrills in awareness, all its currents
apparent, transparent  - its unobstructed flow
coursing with power. You feel the solidness
of it - not as clay, but as imperative,
the joy of presence, unmovedness
of honesty, the certainty of what it is,
what it must be

Ask your body  - it will tell you
what you may have been trying
to assert. Give it credit,
and give it slack. And finally,
give it comfort, for it deserves to know
you will take care of it,
you have its back.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 12, 2021

Recognition

 

May you feel peace in your toes.
May you feel strength in your feet.
May you feel confidence
in your stride, and joy
in every breath

This moment belongs to you.
This is you as celebration.
This is you as recognition
that every one of your steps
is met with support as deep
as the earth, and what you reach for
rushes to meet you

The fact of your substance
can't be hidden any longer.
You'll feel it rising up
more and more each day,
creating the bridge
that closes the gap
and lets all of heaven bloom forth.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 10, 2021

House of Justice

 

The rooms of this house  -
I consecrate them  -
Let them be fully filled
with harmony. Let the rhythm
of Soul so saturate the spaces
that everything within reverberates

This is a house of justice,
so all who enter here
are seen for what they truly are.
There is no frequency here
for false representation  -
it finds no chord and so is left in silence

And even if your truest tone
has so far never sounded,
it will ring out here,
so true are the harmonics  -
if you didn't know  before,
you will know now,
and so will all the dwellers
in the house.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 9, 2021

Benediction

 

May the truth of your being
come upon you
as joyfully and peacefully
as a tree full of birds,
their chirps and whistles
loud from their multitude,
spilling into the morning air,
an aural sunshine
bright against the clouds.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 8, 2021

Demeanor

 

Let me slip in
with calm confidence,
let me slip into the cage
with no fear of the snarling  beast

I will bring nothing with me -
nothing of pride, nothing of judgment,
I will go with trust
that nothing that I am
can be attacked
and that my fearlessness
can bring the needed evidence,
my love
can bring the needed peace.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 7, 2021

Along the shafts

 

These days I see the light everywhere  -
in the glow of wood grain,
in between the ribs
of all these living vessels of hope
(however much they cover it)

I see it along the shafts of rain,
and in compassion
that rises between the stories
of untold pain. I see it
in how much
everything alive desires to live,
and how the sky
hugs us all around
and holds us in.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 6, 2021

Shaken

 I love your happy pictures,

your confident success
and the feeling of security
because you have arrived

What is this braided shadow
that I feel? – that everything I see here
will be shaken
one way or another,
but it will be OK

It will be shaken till you know
your worth is not dependent
on this or any other points
you have achieved

They will be shaken
but with infinite compassion
so you feel
the vastness of the blessing of your days,
that your joy is not dependent
on things that can be lost,
and your goodness what can never fade away.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 3, 2021

Ember

 

I lay by the fire
absorbing warmth like a coal,
and even marinating
in all kinds of sorrow
the cracks of light glowed through me
just like embers
attesting to what I am made of
and what will sustain me
through this and every passage
to the dawn.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 5, 2021

A place of angels

 

Let us meet each other
in a place of angels,
where there is no baggage
of what we said yesterday,
or what we have said and done
these past thirty-nine years

Let us be caught up in the light
of present splendor,
of coming into
all we are meant to be

Let us blend lights
with all the angels here,
especially the one
we learned so much love from

Let's apply that learning
to each other and to everyone
who intersects our vision,
who brings their quintessential radiance
into the day.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 1, 2021

Spirit Vision

 

In the vision I saw
the high saturation of Spirit  -
it was nothing pale, nothing you could miss

Its color made the daily objects
almost hard to see, so washed out
they were, so ghostlike,
while Spirit filled the whole canvas
with bright rays of power,
becoming the obvious substance
to walk in, to speak of,
to use for all motion and action,
to be for, to be about,
to live in.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 30, 2021

Peace

 

I come around again to peace  -
Is it cued by the music?
Or by the still place that I made
from working breath and body?
Or is it sweet forgiveness, knowing all of us
are here, and all desiring
this same sense of release
and homing, and being wrapped in kindness,
and being kindness itself,
ever able to forge its way

across the deep.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 29, 2021

Song

 

Let Spirit breathe through you
until you notice
you are not a structure being sounded through,
not a flute, not a pipe, but rather
the song itself

And the timbre is not a product
of anything but Spirit,
and the tune is ever Spirit's own,
and the words -
how much like home they feel!
- for all the song resounds
with what you are,
as Spirit sings your every tone.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 28, 2021

Under clouds

 

Soft rain, shrouding clouds,
a low solar day
in which we rely on fire
for comforts we desire,
and friendship, that essential connection,
to stand in for the sun

The day began with knowing
where my love comes from,
and now ends in the peace
of love well done.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 27, 2021

Mind Fire

 

Thoughts lick like flames
around new concepts in my mind,
trying to make sense,
looking for ways to get inside
and comprehend the matter
through and through

I find it warming
and a little bit exciting  -
maybe when this is all clear,
so much more understanding
will be in reach,
maybe I'll soar in ways
I've only dreamed of till now.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 26, 2021

This Day

 

It is a contented lipity lap
with which the pages of the day
fall layered and random
in my thought - the talking on the phone,
efforts to integrate new things
into the household order,
planning for a gathering a few days hence,
neglecting chores

And gratitude, although I had no urge to force it,
rose like sun-drenched clouds
through moments in my day,
arresting skys commanded my attention,
rays and colors couldn't help but draw forth praise.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 25, 2021

Equality

 

Look how everything has fallen in,
like sand into water,
look how every way we rated things
is gone -
the structures, the tallies,
elaborate rubrics,
purveyors of influence
all rendered silent

Here we are melted
in the variegated sheen
where each gleam
bears clear witness ,
infinity's equalization
showing the depth we possess,
all of us needed,
none of us less.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 24, 2021

This waterfall

 

The demons are put to silence.
They are not permitted to use your voice
to rage. You have control
of your voice, and your thoughts.

And if this is not clear, the demons
may be permitted to rush down violently
and choke themselves. Whereby you can notice
that you are still here,
quiet, untouched.
You can receive
all the goodness offered you.
Hold out your hands, open your mouth
and take it in.
You never ran with them actually.
You have always stood here
like a mountainside,
you have always been this waterfall.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 22, 2021

River of regret

 

This is something else  - a river of regret,
something we all swim in, however we held ourselves,
whether superior, privileged, clean,
or rebellious, devious, naughty,
justified, victimized,
thoughtless,  or cruel,
or having missed out on the party

The river carries us all -
I may notice
who comes up next to me -
how we might never have
been within arm's length
in our former life

But the tears we flow in
are just the same, and the cleansing
does its work on all of us,
and it takes us to somewhere
much farther down the bank,
somewhere we can't yet imagine.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 20, 2021

Reset

 

I'm thinking about
all the sorrows of the world -
the big and little heartbreaks,
chasms of loss, and trauma
walled up and sealed away, hidden
deep within the mazes of forgetting,
leaking out at unexpected times,
fluids of shame, embarrassment,
spumes of rage and helplessness

I'm thinking about
all the sorrows of the world,
all the tears that strive to cleanse,
all the keening, calling for connection ...
and thinking what it could mean
if everything can be turned,
like a page, like a dream,
if everyone could be released,
allowed to flow home
to their native wholeness,
more than forgiven - rendered innocent -
ultimately untouched by any story,
fully seen, delighted to be known.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 19, 2021

Resolution

 

I will know myself
down to the strong curl within,
I will not turn my head,
I will not make excuses

I will take ownership
of everything I am,
leave nothing to the whim of chance
or to the will of other forces.
I will be honest
ever as deeply as I know,
for only then
can I steer my course aright.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 17, 2021

Present Heaven

 

Who am I to say I know
all the forms of love, or even think
that I would recognize them? Much less,
to place myself as expert, curator

Oh no, I'm here to see,
and gather what I can,
and hold the hope of tasting
something old or new of love
everywhere I turn

I will not try to catalog the infinite.
Instead, I will be glad to have been given
the faculty to see love in the ways I can,
which makes this puzzled earth
a present heaven.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 16, 2021

Adventure

 

We live in this great adventure
(for certainly our life is more
than plodding doggedly toward death)

Life must ever be adventure
(or why would we persist with it
day after challenge riddled day?)

We live in Life's adventure
(or we could say that Life's adventure
is what we are)

Adventure we see unfolding
just like life unfolds,
branching and fusing
and moving all kinds of mountains,
as we live out what we are
and find out
what we will be.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 15, 2021

Speaking in Tongues

 

There is a language that we all speak -
it glows between whatever words we use,
it finds a way to dart out
like a child's skip,
like a smile that sparks between two beings,
a shaft of trust that plumbs the deepest histories

When we listen in that language,
any words will work
and few of them are needed -
life blooms up from stone,
things that were lost
become the trail that leads us home.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 14, 2021

A Potent Force

 

All of us belong
to desire, whatever impulse
seems to spark our movement,
whatever construct
we may feel defines us

All of us have
the same Spirit lifting us
into our words and our yearning,
guiding us into our doing

And if we ever think we're stuck
in some replay of actions and reactions,
lodged within unfruitful ways of thinking,
the same desire
will use the force of factual presence,
simple and unstoppable,
to break through those illusions
and set us free.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 13, 2021

Normal

 

I said, we're where we can imagine
living a normal life ...

But what is normal, anyway,
and who decides that,
and who measures it?
Who advertises it,
who uses it to sell stuff,
and how does it relate
to what we're building here?

The whole point being
to be forging
a different way of looking
at everything  -
purpose, comfort, how we do things -
the whole point being
the incremental learning
of how to live an honest life.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 12, 2021

Ground

 

And if I thought I might fall
through the cracks of the day,
tumble between the tasks,
blown by an ill wind of complaint,
if I thought I might be discouraged
by its unrelenting howl,
there is always the ground

There is always the intense
springing of life, through the soil,
through the grass, through my feet.
There is always the recognition
of how great the "we"
of all life, how layered and irrepressible
it is, how it sings in the deer's taste of grass,
in the flash of a bluebird's wing,
how it rests in my breath
while the day's lullabies
prepare a place for me.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 11, 2021

Well Done

 Twilight sets in at 4:30,

and with it, rain, and satisfaction
at having used the day well,
being outside and moving projects forward
as weather allowed, being ready now
to shift into indoor tasks
and inward work,
rich in the light and heat we gathered
in the brighter moments of the day.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 10, 2021

Unexpected Glory

 

Things can be more beautiful
than you thought - seams can crack open,
unimagined light can pour through
at any part of your life -
things you've tended, especially,
but also what you've forgotten,
or what is given you
from the kindness of others
(from what they've tended
or maybe what they unexpectedly found)

Life can be more beautiful
than the dogged portion you've allowed yourself,
or the comfort that you've settled for,
the compromise, the resignation

Anybody's life can open up
in unexpected glory,
bringing blessing to themselves
and many others

Your life can be
the light you hoped for it -
ask and seek, and seek and ask -
it will come forth.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 9, 2021

Flood Tides

 

There may be moments
where you see the whole tide
of what we have called history -
sweeping events, toxic thought forces
that left so many tangled, stranded,
caught in some anomaly of feeling,
left alone, or shattered, fractured,
grinding brokenly against others
in thoughtless eddies
of interactions

You may find peace in knowing
none of this is your fault  -
not where you started
or how you landed
or what people said were
choices that you made

You may find peace in feeling
the flood tides slowly rising,
lifting you up, bringing us back together,
giving a way to reimagine
what it means to live here on this earth.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 8, 2021

A Pearl

 

  

Here is a pearl you could wear
on a long chain, belly level,
perhaps - a truth you could use
when you need it, a secret reminder

You could remember your life
is already loved, and it doesn't need
lies to prop it up
or fears to keep it safe

Your love is served by truth,
your truth augments your love -
they hold you in the safe place
where you know you are enough.

©Wendy Mulhern
November 7, 2021