Faithful

 

If I am faithful
I will not entertain
thoughts of bleakness  -
I will refuse to let them
slouch their way into my view
with their little excuses
and offhand insinuations that
what they are asserting
is all I should expect,
all that I deserve

I can be faithful
even if I haven't yet seen
the way all these gifts
come together, the way
everything is provided for each
child of the light, including
their opportunity to really shine,
including their shining
lighting the path for others,
including how they make the vision
be fully seen.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 28, 2021

Spreading Out

 

Less than a month till the Equinox  -
bluebirds and robins and juncos
come through, flitting in flocks
among the T-posts and dried stalks,
showing their particular
flashes of feathers,
they, like us, having passed
under the low bars of winter,
spreading out now,
reaching and yearning
for the longer warmer days.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 27, 2021

Living Water

 

Try to describe this:
seeing yourself as a waterfall
instead of a vessel,
constantly pouring forth,
rather than capturing
that which you need,
having it
by virtue of being it,
receiving it constantly
only by giving it away

Knowing yourself beloved,
not by what's given you -
by what you find yourself giving,
knowing it's yours,
and knowing it's you,
by all that is blessed
at your banks.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 26, 2021

Heavenly

 

Softly and suddenly
images of heavenly
filled me up
with gratitude, with joy

A scene from memory played back
but with an overlay of richness
overwhelming me with sweetness
of your being, of our being then, together

And it wasn't sad - it wasn't
as if those memories lived in the past -
they were not gone -
they radiated present tense,
they give me more
right in my here and now, and more -
they give me you.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 25, 2021

Step Forth

 

All the stories you have heard
are not your story,
all the endings you may have thought
foreshadowed what would come of you
are not your ending

Pick up your tale - don't let it
drag in the dust -
you aren't ordained to go the way
you have been told befalls
everyone else,
and no one else is either

Pay attention  - this is not a time to drift,
it's not a time to fall,
It's time to catch your upward lift,
time to embrace your all

Take in the new unfolding steps
as courage leads you -
This is your story, and the world's  -
Step forth - it needs you.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 23, 2021

Emerge Gently

 

There's a reason
to approach all progress
with a gentle grace

There's a logic to the structure  -
though a building may rise high,
it never grows beyond the need
for its foundation

Though I gain a lofty view,
there's no outgrowing kindness,
and the love that grounds me
must always be the first thing,
and must shine through
whatever I attain.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 22, 2021

On passing more than one inspection

 Maybe we've forgotten 

or maybe we never knew
how to celebrate -
little leaps to match inner elation,
thoughts of calling someone to proclaim,
a feast, a party  - but no, we can't do that,
and so we go to town and get.a sandwich
(and also some propane)

And sleep in, the next day, a little later,
and have a slightly shorter day of work,
and set ourselves up for the next sprint,
which will be fun. And therein lies the joy -
it will be fun!

©Wendy Mulhern
February 20, 2021

Light Bearing

 

It's not about being right,
it's not about winning

The omni-directionality
of the converging chorus
overcomes, with its sheer beauty,
any operatic sense

For you'll find
you'd rather be part of it
than be exalted on your own  -
you'd rather be an unnamed conduit
of this transforming light
than to be spotlighted,
called out as a star

You'd rather know
someone went home
feeling filled with brightness
and shared it with their family
and they all felt
delighted in and blessed

You'd rather know
this light is the current
that keeps everything going,
just as it always has
and always will.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 19, 2021

Bubble

 

The windshield melts the image
but not the trees
into the soft wet of the afternoon

We have retreated
into this decadent warmth,
fleeing the frenzy of the work
and the chill of the dampness,
choosing this luxury bubble
which proves
we aren't wholly rooted
in the rigors of homestead living -
we can watch it
like reality TV
through the glass
at least for a while.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 18, 2021

Good Morning

 

Birds were singing and some trucks rolling
as we awoke and
untangled our limbs from our dreams,
and twined, one more time, together,
as the morning light started
to come in the window,
and we entertained the notion
of one or two more minutes
of lazy languor, though we knew
we would get up soon

We would bring with us
into the day
the sweet equanimity,
the readiness to bless,
the easy comfort
of having no one to judge
and everyone to appreciate,
much to do, but also
enough space, enough time.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 16, 2021

Nodding Off

 

After I fed us
we both fell asleep
before we intended to -
you, by the fire, letting your book drop -
I watched the twitch of your folded hands,
the nod of your head, wondering
if this was an effort at meditation

Then I woke up with a start,
also having nodded in my chair  -
my page still blank,
the fire almost out

One more piece of wood
for the stove, one more
cup of tea,
the single flame, like me,
probably unable to keep burning
till the wood is gone.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 15, 2021

Still Untold

 

You wanted to stand up and speak,
you wanted your story
to be told,
you wanted them all to know
how much she meant to you

But all your words kept being swallowed
in second guessing and regret,
and by the knowledge that your anguish
wasn't something you could convey, anyway,
wasn't something that people
had the capacity to hear.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 14, 2021

Fully Clear

 

And if you need to stand up
in a crowded room
and speak for yourself,
if you need to be witnessed,
if you have done so, many many times
in the theater of your mind

Then the least I can offer
is a sympathetic ear,
an acceptance free of judgment,
a starting point that everyone deserves,
a place your innocence can surface,
can find its focus,
can come fully clear.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 13, 2021

Ready

 

I start first with the traffic 

in my mind
"to bless and not condemn " -
Thoughts pass by quickly,
they arc and settle in the places
they have gone before  -
I have to pull them out
and see what object they have held
and if they blessed or they condemned.
If they need correcting
I have to do it

There is plenty of traffic.
("to love and not judge ")
- the judgment being so dismissive,
requiring no more thought  -
as neatly tied and closed
as a politician's speech,
so easy to write off.
While loving - that's a far deeper engagement,
which, if I've done truly,
will stay with me

"To heal and not pass by" -
There is no neutral ground  -
despite my arsenal of reasons
not to offer aid.
There's only one answer
that engages what I am
and what I'm here for -
There's no real option
to turn away.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 12, 2021

Thanks to Ross Safronoff for quoted text

A Dream

 

We were going down the mountain
you had taken your shoes off
walking through streams
I was running to catch up with you
the light was soft
the landscape fuzzy
as it often is in dreams
the path was longer
than we'd anticipated
it was an hour before dark
but we weren't worried  -
Dad could come with the car
and rescue us
or we could wake up  -
it would come out
to the same thing.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 10, 2021

Things of beauty

 

In our little hovel cabin
the only things of beauty
are the fire, and the warmth it gives,
and the corresponding glow
in our faces, from the fire's heat
and the day's work, and the comfort
that we have with each other

And a few good books,
and some words of hope,
and the darkness,
once we've gone to bed,
and the quiet, deep enough
to hear a heartbeat.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 9, 2021

What hope is for

 

This time I wasn't even surprised
to see my brand new beautiful hope
get taken out for a thrashing  -
no easy, luxurious dawn
for the truth I glimpsed  - instead,
a winter wind, anger and tears

I suppose it makes sense
for hopes to prove their mettle,
to catch the storm in their sails,
to drive me forward

And it did right itself, before day's end,
did bring in some kind of fruit,
did prove itself able to stand,
showing its strength through its trial,
showing what hope is for.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 8, 2021

Tree Talk

 

You talk to the trees at night
and their silence  - maybe it speaks to you  -
maybe their response  -
of presence without words -
is in the language you are searching for -
something that won't get caught
in the filters of the mind,
that will go right through
to where you've been waiting
all this time -
waiting to hear the deep tall message
that recognizes your soul.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 6, 2021

 

In the morning
I seek out my Spirit home -
sometimes it's right there,
sometimes, as today,
it seems a long journey  -
it seems dark, it seems drizzly,
puddles settling in again to places
the sun routed them from yesterday,
platitudes trying to referee my thoughts

But Spirit is all present
(thank heaven for that!)
and there are many places
kindly held open
for that awareness to seep through

I may exert great effort
(not letting go until I'm blessed)
but my effort doesn't win it -
Omnipresence, finally,
is what finds me home.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 5, 2021

A touch of melancholy

 

And yes - could be my tears
are self indulgent  -
they haven't risen, anyway,
but hover somewhat below the surface,
a slightly troubled pool
like the puddles were this morning,
with just a little rain

Rain and sun have beat
through the day,
rainbows have refereed,
raindrops have glittered,
falling against the blue sky,
winds have whipped around

And also there's been stillness,
those moments met with something
a little less than spirited within me,
to pass without analysis or comment
like twilight into night.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 3, 2021

World Problem

 

So surprising to discover
the world won't do whatever it does
with or without me. It doesn't trundle
down its processes by itself.
I can't choose whether or not
my presence here
will be felt

So quieting to consider
the world is a problem
for me to solve alone.
I must work it out
(as must everyone)

I must come to the conclusion
of the whole matter
(as must everyone)
whether I do it now or later  -
I have, it turns out,
all the time in the world.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 2, 2021

This Dream

 

This dream has no power
to make decisions,
This dream
holds no tricks
up its sleeve,
This dream has no mind
to chain a link of cause, effect  -
This dream holds no destiny

All.the dips and turns I see
which in another frame
I could call fate
are just the subtle tippings
of myriad beliefs  -
there is no law on which they operate

What holds us steady,
what guides us on our course,
what gives us every meaning,
every sense of purpose,
shines through from realms
we only sometimes glimpse  -
the riddle of the infinite unseen.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 1, 2021